All i wanted was mutual trust and respect for each other . Simple . And the most important key to long lasting relationship . That's all . You choose to continue being so childish and quarrel till 没完没了everyday, i'd rather we go on separate ways . We will have less troubles troubling us, since we couldn't stop quarreling .

It's been 10 months going on 11 months of being together alr . But i don't understand why, our relationship just lack of one simple thing - trust .

If two person truly love each other deep enough, there should be mutual trust between them . That's the most important thing to make a relationship last . Whereas if there's lack of trust, both party are always suspecting each other and did not trust that the other party will be faithful, this only shows that the person did not know whether he or she loves the other party deeply or not . If you're constantly doubting the other party, then what's the point of being together? I see no point. In a relationship if you truly love the other party, you should fully trust that person, and not doubting whether he or she might leave you . If you really love that person, you should give that person happiness, and not doubting that person everyday.

This shows how important a trust is, between a relationship. It also shows how much you really loved that person. Because if you trust, you wouldn't end up doubting that person and in the end quarrel till non-stop. This shows a lack of trust, and you are unsure of how much that person really love you .

Now i've finally understand . All along i had been so childish. Baby, i shall fully trust you from now on . Because i truly love you, deeply . The only way that you want a person to be happy is to just trust that person . If there's mutual trust, there's happiness and peace . Only then, a relationship would last . (:

It's 1 o2 am now :D And i'm still up . (:

Hmms , i've just finished my geog and physics . :O And i guess darling's sleeping now bah ? Hahahas . :O Gonna blog , and this post is especially for darling (: ( darling, i never talk to anybody hor :O Don't anyhow think x.x )

Darling , i know i'm kinda over sensitive at times . But do you know why ? Cos i really care . :\ A lot .. Just dw any girls to get near you D: You cannot say that nothing will happen at all , you can't predict yeah ? ;o We can't predict the future , that's why i wanna be safe than sorry . Already got two sot bitches trying to break us up . Though i know there's no way they could break us up, but i just don't like it . Harrassment leh x.x Not that i wanna restrict, but sometimes you're just getting too overboard ler . You should know the limits bah ? Talk to girls about serious matters and class work i'm okay with it de . But you are talking to girls with other topics like , the girl shares her stories and troubles with you .. Or maybe saying about some other stuffs .. Okay i admit that i'm kinda oversensitive about that, but i just don't like ? :\ Same as , you don't like me to talk to guys cos you scared guys will fall for me yeah ? ;o It's the same for me (: I don't want girls to fall for you . I know you're popular , cute , friendly , sociable , outgoing blah blah blah , your 条件 is every girl's ideal boyf , of course so many people like you lah . But i don't really like it lor , cos i have a lot of competitors , very irritating de leh . ): Very bu shuang .. Not that i wanna pick on you on those matters lurhh darling , must understand okays ? (: Okay lurhh , i shall not tie the rope so tight , i shall let you have the freedom to talk , but know your limits okay ? (: ( limits as stated above for your reference . ) Hahas , and of course , don't hide from me that you're talking to girls . You don't like me to hide things from you , it's the same for me here ;o Hide things will only make me suspect you in a wrong way lor . x.x Not really good yeah ? ;o

And for the replying slow thing . Okay, you said you were busy with work and charging your phone . So yeah i've chosen to trust that that's really the reason ( hope its true yeah ). But one thing i'm unhappy about is that you don't wanna be specific with what you're doing at that point of time , which often makes me suspect you're doing something else D: Lols . It's not that i purposely want say you ______ . ( you know what is it ) But what you did really make me suspect you're hiding away from me , trying to avoid my msg and such , do you know ._. Okay , you experienced it before yeah ? When i'm having my exams you tio ps like dk what like that ;o But i made an effort to tell you every details of what i'm doing to assure you that i'm really doing work and make you less worry . That's the thing i want from you , and not just say ps, you're busy or what . I just wanted to know what you're busy with ;o Hehs . So yeah , hope you understand lurhh . :3

Darling uh, i find that there's a change in your attitude recently lor ._. Feel kinda weird . Last time you used to tell me a lot of stories de ? And then now you like kinda reluctant . ._. Lols . And you became more attitude ler . It's like , just kup phone cos i need go eat or something, you will just get dulan ? Lols . And sometimes you give those kinda heck care attitude . x.x Like last time when i am sad or i cry, you'll like help to wipe away my tears and try all ways to cheer me up. Then now you like don't really care ler .__." Or maybe its because i cry too much and you're used to it ler . LOL . But i cry cos i'm sad and i really care , and sometimes just kinda scared lor . :\ but you like that it as nothing happen . So yeah .. :\

I know i've been guailan to you these few days , keep sut you and such . I'm sorry okay ? :\ Hmms , cos i'm really kinda paranoid at times, and will start thinking a lot of things which adds on to the anger towards you not replying my msg or giving me attitudes . I know you tried to cheer me up and you apologised , but i still carry on 耍小姐脾气 ;x but yeah , cos i'm not really assured . That explains why, haha . Hmm, i promise i'll try to change on that point alrights ? (: I think that i should just trust you . Trust is a very important thing in a relationship . I love you a lot , that's why i dare to trust you . (: Hehs .

Yeap , that's all i've gotta say . Hahahas . :O I know what's darling gonna say after reading this post . " I don't read de lor , cos i don't understand . I want you to hear it on phone . " ;p yeah ? Hahahahs . Okay lurhh , i'll say it on phone to you tmr okay ? (: Hehs , sorry idk how to say out directly . Cos i will say until very 乱 and unorganised one . x.x Hahahas , now i organise it and type everything out alr tmr can tell you in orderly manner ler . ;D Hehs .

Okays , its 1 35 now . I took a bloody 30 mins to type this post . ;o Like kinda long leh ;x Okay la i know i type very slow LOL . Darling alr sleeping till dk where alr ler lah . xD Lost in lalaland alr . Okay lurhh , think i shall go to lalaland and find darling and kill that big big monster with darling ler ! ;p -winks- Hahahas , nights ! :O Sweetdreams&sleeptight, ilovejoeyforever ! ♥

Darling , i'm sorry i didn't realise what i did to hurt you so much ):

Didn't realise how unthoughful i was, didn't realise how it hurts to be ignored .
I'm sorry . :\

Darling , i shall explain it down here first okay ? :O Really hope you'll try to understand ( will tell you again on phone ? (: )
Okay , i didn't really mean to ps you lurhh . I just merely didn't want to be guailan to friend because its just like 15 minutes and she waited for me and pei-ed me to retrieve my ezlink card back mah . :\ She waited so how could i be so bad to ps her x.x Yeah . I thought you would just understand lurhh because its 15 minutes or so only . Of course i know you wanna talk to me lurhh, i wanna talk to you also :\ immediately after she went off, i ask you to call mah but you ignored me . 15 mins , i confirm will give it back to you de mah , we have whole night to chat leh . :O you want i can return you back double de time (: 30 mins ~ Hehs , or maybe more lurhh . Feel happy chatting with you leh, like chatting with you will make me relax from my hell busy day . (: Your voice make me so relaxed after a whole day of lesson lurhh :O

For the blog thing , it's the past ler. I read my own blog and apparently i didn't know what i'm writing also ;x Seriously, i ownself write de things i don't understand . After reading, i was like thinking why the hell did i wrote such disgusting things ;o But seriously, its all untrue (: Trust me . As you can see, i love my clique like idk what hell . Means, i wasn't serious with him . (: This is one way to prove . ( and then after that i still can happily go out with clique and do a lot of crappy stuffs . ) . But comparing it to you , there's no way he could be compared to you . Yeah , don't even need to compare right ? As you can see , i mind more about my friends than anything else but for you, its totally different . Great difference if you can see . This year, can say i totally never go out with clique or what . And in the end become no clique at all :O In my world, it's only you , do you notice ? (: You're my everything . Even without a friend , it's not a problem . As long as you're there for me . :O My world revolves around you and only YOU ! ((:

And anw , you said you wanted to put away the past ler . We said it this morning , isn't it ? :O We shouln't go look into the past anymore . It doesn't concern us anything . What's past is already the past . As i said, you're the first one i truly love; and the last one i will love (: See ! You're the only one ! :D What you have to care/know now is i LOVE you and i only CARE for YOU ! :D Nothing could ever change the fact that i love the one and only you . (: Hmms , since its already the past, you shouldn't go think about it . And moreover, what's there to compare ? You're the first one i love, how could you go compare with a person i wasn't serious with ? It's totally different thing leh :O He got nothing, you got everything . So, my darling, there's no need to compare alright ? (: You're the only one and will be the only one , IN MY HEART ♥ ! :D

I LOVE CHUA JOEY MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE AND WILL LOVE HIM NOW AND FOREVER ! ♥

Omgzx ! ;D I oh-so-finally get to ton with baby and its super duper fun lurhh ! :D
Hehs, darling's parents went to genting and i went to his house to ton . (:

Morning, trained down to darling's place to deposit my bag and then we went out for breakfast at loyang point together . ( So jealous i'm not the first girl to walk to loyang point with him but some bitch . ) :O So yeap , pei darling to go for his haircut ( his hair was super cute after the haircut ) and went to have breakfast at a foodcourt . After that, went to Shengsiong to buy some food to cook at home . ;D Rent a movie - Hot fuss (?) - and watched in the afternoon . The movie was hilarious but kinda disgusting though . M18 de movie .

After the movie, went to play maple together ;D hehs . Maple maple maple ~ Darling trained me for awhile . After that we decided to go to eHub at downtown east for dinner. Bathed and bus-ed down to eHub together . It was drizzling . :O Lol .

Reached and then had dinner at the food court at downtown east . There was some halloween event going on at downtown east and it's really cool . Some people were all dressed up as some scary scary monsters walking around trying to scare people walking around at downtown . One which stares right into my face ? LOL . Didn't got frighten but kinda disgusted by the bloodified faces ;x HAHA .

After that we decided to go for late night movies at eHub . Bought movie tickets and watched Poker King . That show's quite nice ;D About poker, and it's damn cool :O Quite funny too xD Hehs . ;D I love watching movies with darling lurhh ! ;D Hehs . After the movies, we actually wanted to play bowling but decided not to because there's a lot of people and we didn't know how to play ( the only thing we know was to roll the ball across the hallway and hit the pins ;x ) LOL . So yeah, decided to go home and continue to slack at home . Cabbed to darling's .

Watched some funny cartoon and after that went to play maple before we fell asleep . :O

The next morning, woke up at 8 . Had our breakfast ( some eggs and sausages and french fries :O ) and watched tv . ;D Doraemon ~ ;p After breakfast went down for a swim. Had loads of fun ~ ;o hoho .

After the swim we went down to city plaza to get my contact lens from my cousin . Had our lunch there first before going back to Jurong :O Kinda don't bear to go back . Tonning with darling was so fun lurhh , miss him damn loads :\ I wanna ton with darling again ! D: So hope that i had another night with him . Cos quite a lot of things we have not done yet ): ( erhem , don't xiang wai . not that thing . ._. ) Wanted to play pool de . And actually wanted to stay awake the whole night . :\ Kinda wasted . I want another night with darlingggggggggggggggggg D:

Alrights, that's for this post .
Hmms, kinda have a quarrel with darling now D: Rawrs . He said he wanna talk to a girl call lynette ! D: Sad liaos, sighs .. ): And he doesn't wanna reply me T.T


I miss darling .. ♥

我想带你回我的外婆家一起看着日落一直到我们都睡着。
我想就这样牵着你的手不放开，爱能不能够永远单纯没有悲哀？